9 Dating Mistakes You’re Making Right Now

Why Can't I Find the One?

Dating can be tough. It is a lot of trial and error, deciding when to stick around and when to go, and hearing a lot of “it’s not you it’s me.” But what if it really is you? There are a lot of people out there just as there are a lot of ways to go about dating, but the truth is that you might be making the whole dating process harder on yourself. Here is a list of 9 dating mistakes you are making right now and how to right them in time to find someone you don’t want to throw back into the dating pool:

You’re settling for less.

Sometimes we fall prey to the first person that expresses interest in us that we forget to wait for someone who we actually like and have things in common with. Don’t settle for someone that is clearly a poor match for you just because it is convenient or you find yourself flattered. Make sure you actually see potential for things to go somewhere otherwise you’re just wasting everyone’s time.

Dream relationship

What the Person You Deserve is Like

You over-share with someone new.

Opening up to someone new can be an exciting and vulnerable time for both of you, and it can be even more vulnerable for you if you open up too much too soon. Know what information they really need to know about you upfront and save the rest for when you are further down the road. The reasoning here is two-fold: One, it’s fun to get to know people slowly so you can get to really know each other on a deeper, meaningful level. Two, if things don’t work out, you don’t have regrets about telling them all your deep dark secrets. It really is a win-win.

 

You have a “type.”

While it’s a good to have a general idea for what you are looking for, don’t limit yourself to dating within your type. Just because you have been attracted to a certain type of person in the past does not mean that is a good match for you. In fact, it might mean quite the opposite. After all, there’s a reason those relationships didn’t work out.

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You’ve got a checklist for your love interest.

Again, have an idea of what you’re looking for but don’t expect to find someone that can check off all of the boxes. Depending on how long your list is, it is more likely that this hypothetical person doesn’t exist in the first place. Figure out where you can compromise (Does your love interest really need to have blonde or curly hair? Does The Great Gatsby really have to be their favorite book? ) and where you cannot (you know you’re looking for a serious relationship and one day want children). Look for someone who fulfills the essentials and consider everything else a bonus. Who knows, maybe this real person will turn out better than anything your checklist could have imagined or allowed for.

 

You’re too indecisive.

Many are guilty of this one. When asked where to go, you reply far too often with “I don’t care” instead of saying where you really want to go or even making a suggestion. If you really didn’t care before, it’s time to start caring now. Leave things up to your date on occasion, but make sure you have things you like to do as well and make suggestions for dates you’ll actually enjoy. Don’t be afraid to share your opinion and, at the very least, make sure you have one.

desperate

Are You Too Cling?

You drunk dial/ drunk text.

Often times reaching out when drunk leaves the other with a funny voicemail or text to enjoy the next morning, but it certainly isn’t without consequences. While they might get a good laugh out of it, drunken messages will not make them like you. In fact, it might do more harm than good. More often than not, messages like these get misinterpreted and come off as immature. This can really hinder your chances of finding the relationship you’re looking for. Put the phone away when you are drinking and you’ll find you have one less thing to regret in the morning.

 

You’re waiting.

While it is appropriate to wait when it comes to finding someone that is a good fit for you, it is not a good idea to wait when it comes to making the first move. The reality is that someone is going to have to make the first move for things to go anywhere for you two, so you might as well step forward and introduce yourself. Be the one to set the ball in motion and dare to see how things play out when you throw the rulebook out the window.

Mr. Right

Finding The Right Person For You

You rush into sex.

I would love to say that when you sleep with someone really depends on the relationship and you’ll just feel it when the time is right. But the truth is that there can be such a thing as “too soon” when it comes to sex…at least if you’re looking for things to turn into an actual relationship. Assess where you want things to go before rushing into things in this category to avoid being a one night stand if you’re looking for someone long-term.

 

You’re pretending to be someone you’re not.

Don’t be a reflection of who you think someone is looking for. Just be yourself. Anything else will ring false to you, lowering your self-esteem and making you miserable. On top of that, it is obvious when you are not being genuine. Accept yourself for who you are as a person and find someone who can appreciate you for you. The right person for you is out there but you won’t find them by being someone you are not to stay with someone who is entirely wrong for the real you.

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#dating #mistakes #rightperson

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