While some people find a hint of jealousy to be endearing (it’s a sign someone cares about you, right?), there is such a thing as an unhealthy amount (as jealousy tends to stem from insecurity). It might be unclear as to where this point begins exactly, but here are some signs that the jealousy has gone too far:
They get upset when you scan the room full of people, linger in a general direction other than their own for too long, or do anything that resembles placing your attention on someone else.
When you have trouble finding your phone, you know the first place to check is in their hand.
You hear them say, “You’re acting real shady” more than you hear them say “You are cooler than Slim Shady.” Or, you know, “I love you.”
For your birthday, they got you an ankle monitor. (“It’s like an anklet, but more expensive!”)
For Christmas, they got you a back up ankle monitor so you no longer have an excuse for not wearing one. (Even if you really did accidentally wear the first one in the pool where it somehow ran into a hammer repeatedly).
For Arbor day…well, you get the idea.
They are convinced that you are always checking out someone else even when you assure them that you have no idea what they are talking about. And you honestly have no idea what they are talking about.
Worse yet, they are downright suspicious and mad when someone else is paying too much attention to you within your group or even with imagined glances from across the room.
When they see that you are dressed up, they insist on knowing why. “Just because I felt like it” is not an acceptable answer and “I’m dressed up to see you” comes out even less believable.
Any time spent with a member of the opposite gender is cause for concern or, more accurately, a cause for a fight.
They have made it their business to get to know all your friends…from Facebook…all 754 of them. Don’t worry, they paid special attention to those of the opposite gender. Even more attention to those you so much as talked to. And somewhere in their room is a book filled with notes on all of your exes.
They freak out when you do not text them back right away. Uh, hello?!?! It has already been a minute. I’m waiting.
They cause a scene when you are out together that likely is only “resolved” by them storming away dramatically.
When you are clean-shaven (ahem) on a day you don’t see them, interrogations occur.
Back when you started dating, you had something that resembled private space. It may have been a box, drawer, journal, or even just your phone but it was yours and it was private. Since then, that has been violated. But with “good reason,” of course.
When you inevitably run into one of your exes (thanks, small town), it is somehow your fault. (And stop staring at them!)
You “just happen to run into each other” a lot. Especially when you told them that you were going out with your friends or running an errand.
Also, it is not out of the norm to glance in your rear-view mirror and see a car that looks an awful lot like the one your SO drives.
When left alone with your friends, your SO is known to ask question after question in regards to your exes. They may or may not be seen scribbling notes down after said conversation.
If anyone of the opposite gender so much as acknowledges your existence, you must answer who, what, where, when, why, and how in regards to that person. Right now. Or else.
When you tell them you are at work, school, the dentist, or in the hospital, they demand proof. Proof is more than words. Remember, a picture is worth more than any of your words…but only if it’s time stamped.
You find yourself relating to this list.
More blaringly, you find yourself adding to this list.
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